You know, I brag a lot when it comes to my singing, my writing, and how well I do my job. I sometimes might even brag about the strict rules I placed on my daughter while she was growing up. But, sometimes, isn't it okay to just be proud of what you do/did? Here's a little story....
Alex and I went to dinner with some family members tonight. We hadn't seen them in quite a few months so we spent some time playing "catch up" on how family friends were doing, as well as how their children were doing. As it turns out, the family friends and their children are doing about as well as we expected. Note that we did not have high expectations at all. It seems that Jerry Springer may never run out of people to feature on his show! We know some that would fit right in!
During our conversation, I mentioned to my family this tidbit. When I first started out as a single parent, times were more than rough. We never begged, but we did use several of the poverty-helpful facilities in town. We showed up for free food and clothing on numerous occasions, and there were a couple of years that we had to use the welfare system. I'm not proud of that, but it is there for a purpose.
Although we didn't have much, I ruled with an iron fist. Alex was always quiet and very well-behaved. Even now, I might complain about this or that, but they are minor things. I must remind you that my child doesn't go out, doesn't date, drink, smoke, do drugs, have any mental disorder, sleeze around, etc etc. You get the idea. She is a GREAT kid! Oh, excuse me... she's a great "young adult".
My point is this. I use to idolize the families that had a mom and dad in the house, with 2 incomes and 2 kids, living in a great house with 2 cars. Alex pointed out tonight that those family situations are the exact families that have these screwed up family relations, premature pregnancies, and a multitude of other problems. Now, I'm not saying all such families are like that. I'm saying that the families WE KNOW that are "picture perfect" are really just crap covered with fake smiles and polite omissions of what's really going on. It's kind of embarrassing to hear about their situations. I feel bad for them. It's funny that THEY always looked down on ME for whatever reason. Hrmph! to them!
I look at the situation Alex and I are in now, and I'm proud to have had to bust my ass to get ahead. I'm proud to have been as strict as I was. And I'm proud to know that I did this with help along the way, but help that knew when it was time to let me do it on my own.
I'm a proud lil momma... :)
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1 comment:
As a former single parent myself to two boys--like you, I've been there, done that. So I know all too well the road you have traveled. And to this day, with the boys being 31 and 25, they still call me daily to chat...oftentimes thanking me for the sacrifices I made on their behalf. That is reward enough for me. And yes, even at their ages they still look to me for advice from time to time.
It wasn't until last year that their mother finally apologized to the boys for putting her career ahead of them.
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