In the Midnight Hour

In The Midnight Hour©
                    by Celsi Jude Erwing

   We were all there, in the boat. Me, Bobby, and Max. It was late at night.
We knew we weren't suppose to take the boat out after dark, and I don't know
why we did. All I do know is that there we were, in the middle of the night,
with our three flashlights, two oars, and each other.
  I'm not quite sure whose idea it was, now that I think of it. But we were
best friends and it didn't even matter what we were doing, as long as we were all together. We were sort of like the "Three Musketeers". All for one and one for all. At least, that's what I use to think, until that night.
   *SPLASH* Then it happened! It was so sudden! I didn't know what to do. I
tried to grab him. I kept hollering for him. I grabbed at the water, trying
to get through it as if I were digging a hole in the snow to uncover someone
who had fallen through. I couldn't. I tried, but I just couldn't get to him!
I took one of the flashlights and shined it down into the water, hoping to
see something. I hollered louder and louder, until I wasn't even calling his
name anymore. I was just crying and wailing, knowing he wasn't coming back
up. I knew he was gone. Max was gone, and he was never coming back.
   I remember sitting back on my seat in the boat and, looking through my
tears, I saw Bobby looking straight back at me with no expression at all on
his face. He hadn't tried to help Max get out of the water. He didn't reach
out to save him. Bobby didn't even look down into the wat where we had
lost Max overboard. I know I was shouting at him, cursing him, but I don't
remember all of what I was saying. I just know that I had wished it was 'him'
who had fallen over, instead of Max.
   Somehow, I got Bobby and myself back to shore. He never moved. Not once. When we got to the bank, I just left him there in the boat, staring out at
nothing but the darkness. I left him there like he left Max. I told him that
I wished he was dead, and that I never wanted to see him again. After Max's
funeral, I got my wish. Bobby and his parents moved away from our little town
by the river, and I didn't have to see him ever again.
   It took me several years to get over what had happened that night. It took
several more to believe that I did everything I c have done in trying to
save my drowning friend. And, eventually, I just forgot about Bobby.
   As the years passed by, I went about my life like any normal person. I
went to the local schools and hung out with the boys. When I graduated, I was
enlisted in the army for a <SPAN class=spell id=sp-9 title="Click here to replace with: awhile" style="PADDING-RIGHT: 2px; BACKGROUND-POSITION: left bottom; PADDING-LEFT: 2px; BACKGROUND-IMAGE: url(http://sdk.webmail.aol.com/sdk/20050527/images/bg_spellingErr.gif); PADDING-BOTTOM: 2px; CURSOR: pointer; COLOR: black; PADDING-TOP: 2px; BACKGROUND-REPEAT: repeat-x; BACKGROUND-COLOR: yellow" _backupTitle="null">. Upon my return home, I found the perfect
woman and a wonderful job. Two years after our wedding, we had a beautiful
baby boy. We named him Max. My life was so full of everything I could have
ever wanted. Then, my uncle Jack became ill.
   Jack had developed lung cancer, and was too old to survive the pain that
came along with chemotherapy. Shortly after he began treatments, he died. We were never really that close, so without sorrow, I just accepted it as part
of the cycle of life.
   Through all of the years of my life, I could not bring myself to leave
Deerbrook, the small town in which I was born and raised. This was
app the feeling of so many others. The graveyard, where we were to
bury my uncle, had become quite crowded from many of those who also decided to spend their afterlife here.
   As the funeral services began, I saw out of the corner of my eye, a man,
far across the cemetery. He was standing on the grounds of those who were
buried about the time I was nine or ten. Although his back was turned to me
and I didn't recognize him, I wondered why anyone would be here while another funeral was in procession.
   After the Father was done with his eulogy, I wandered over to see who this
stranger was. Upon seeing his face from the side as I approached, I looked to the stone that was protruding from the ground before him. I couldn't believe my eyes. It was him! Bobby had come back after all these years, and, of all days to do it, he had to pick this one.
   I thought about walking away, just going back to my normal happy life. But
for some reason, I couldn't. I never forgave him. How could I walk away from
him again without an explanation? Somehow, I felt I needed at least that
much.
   I continu walking towards him until I was standing right beside him. I
looked at the ston with Max's name on it and closed my eyes, trying not to
remember too much of that night.
   "I should have told you." Bobby's voice was subtle. "I'm sorry." He spoke
as if he knew what I was waiting to hear, what I had waited nearly twenty
years to hear. He looked me in the eyes and I could see that he had had a
hard life. My only guess was that it was self-inflicted by the guilt he must
have felt all this time. Hell, I felt guilty too, for quite some time, and I
was the one who tried to SAVE Max.
   Again, Bobby began to speak. "It wasn't my idea, RAy. I know you always
thought it was, but it wasn't. I was just as scared as you were. We weren't
suppose to be out on the water at night because it was too hard to find the
edge of the banks, remember? Dammit! Our dads always told us that!
   "I don't know why he wanted to go, but he had a plan. He begged me to go
with him. And, like I said, I was scared. That's why I had you go with us.
Max didn't want you there. He was afraid you would chicken out and tell your
dad. Then we would all have gotten our asses whipped.
   "When Max came to get me, he was acting funny. It was kind of like a
frightened bunny. He was in a hurry, but he was also jumpy and skittish. He
wouldn't tell me why. He never did. I never saw him acting that way! Over the
years, I just drew my own conclusion." Turning back to the headstone, he
repeated, "I should have told you."
   Now, I couldn't help remembering EXACTLY what had happened. I remembered Max making some foolish speech about leaving this "good-for-nothing" world, and he was going to find a better place where no one could get to him. He said.... He said "good-bye" to both Bobby and me. I recall laughing at his charade, but not Bobby. All my memories of him were of his non- and emotionless expression, even before Max jumped.
   "Max jumped, didn't he?! He just jumped!" At this recollection that
I had hidden from myself, even as it happened, I was in shock all over again.
   Lifting his head, I saw the same face looking in my eyes that I had when I
was just a boy. "I didn't know what to do. I couldn't think of how to say
good-by to him.... until now." And at this moment, for the first time, I saw
Bobby's eyes shine as they let a single tear fall.